If God is Good...

I have been plowing through school now for 2 years. This week's question for class is about a subject near and dear to my heart and to the heart of God - suffering. What happens to us when we face evil and suffering? Do we run to God or run away? Do we think that God is unaware or just set the world in motion and left us to ourselves to figure it out? Trials and suffering really test the metal of our faith and is an indicator of where our heart is and what we value. Do we believe James when he tell us to consider it all joy when we encounter trials because the testing of our faith will grow us up in our faith (James 1:2-4). Do we believe that the eternal weight of glory far exceeds this present suffering as Paul writes (Romans 8:18, 2 Corinthians 4:16-18)? Dear reader, If you have any questions or doubts about where God is in the midst of evil and suffering I highly recommend reading If God is Good, by Randy Alcorn. 

1. Describe a situation where you were hard pressed by evil or suffered a significant trial. How did your view of God’s sovereignty and goodness affect how you responded?

I want to preface this question with the statement that I think timelines are so valuable. You can look back historically, see how the events of life have unfolded, and how God has moved and grown you. When I reflect back on the timeline of my life it is clear that both attributes of God’s sovereignty and goodness are evident. Each trial that has come my way through the course of my life has prepared me, and continues to inform me of the of God’s sovereignty and goodness, as I travel this winding and troubled road of life. When scripture informs our lives, particularly the attributes of God (Alcorn read Tozer, I read Tozer and Pink) one bump in the road prepares for the next one.

The answer to this question is informed by several statements made by Alcorn in is book:

·      The faith that can’t be shaken is the faith that has been shaken (4)

·      Our failure to teach a biblical theology of suffering leaves Christians unprepared for harsh realities (14)

·      Evil is never good, yet God can use any evil to accomplish his good and sovereign purposes (34)

·      Suffering reminds us to stop taking life for granted and to contemplate the larger picture. God intends that it draw our attention to life-and-death reality far greater than ourselves (43)

As I have reflected on my life along the way there were instances where trying to make sense of things (multiple miscarriages, death of loved ones, near death car accidents, etc.) were what drew me to scripture and began to shape my understanding particularly of the sovereignty and providence of God. As each hurt hit I was drawn more closely to the Word. God was preparing my heart for bigger bumps in the road.

The big blast came in 2002 when I was diagnosed with a chronic debilitating disease that leveled me. As I was coming up from the ash heap I journaled everything, snippets from things I read either in the Word or from another source (other books, sermons, cards and notes that were sent at the time). As I have been reading back through the journal it is clearly evident that God was using that time to begin to help me develop a theology of suffering. I was learning what the goodness of God really meant. Psalm 73 was such a ministry to my soul at the time. Needless to say, the weight of affliction did not end there. It had become a springboard to prepare me for the next big trial that hit our family.

As I began to regain my strength I laid that journal down for a while. It picks up again in May 2005 when our youngest son left the family as a prodigal. He turned his back and walked away. Again the journal chronicles the goodness and sovereignty of God in the midst of great sorrow.  As I turned the pages it has become evident that God has been teaching me the meaning of gratitude in the midst of trial.

I could write hundreds of pages of how I have seen God’s sovereign and good hand in my life, but I will leave you with one journal entry from 3/16/06:

 “God picks the time that looks the darkest and seems the most hopeless to show his power and glory. God’s grace always shines the most brightly against the blackest backdrop.”

 I am not sure of the source. It sounds like Nancy Leigh DeMoss. 

Beyond The Ceiling

From time to time I like to invite guest writers to tell their stories of how they have found God to be good and completely trustworthy in their lives. He courses through our lives in ways we would never think possible, always pointing us upward as we learn to trust Him in the trials and circumstances of our lives. I invite you to read Faith's story of how she experienced the goodness and FAITH-fulness of God in a most unusual circumstance.

Meet My Friend Faith:

It all began as a relaxing evening. My husband, Greg, and I were returning home from taking our daughter’s car to be repaired. Laughing and exchanging funny stories together, we pulled in the driveway. When we walked into our house we noticed some fuzzy material in the hallway. I followed the trail down the hall, all the while muttering, “What did that cat do now?!?!” “This isn’t the cat,” my husband’s shaky voice replied. We stared in disbelief. What had been a cozy, freshly painted and newly carpeted family room 30 minutes before was now a war zone buried in drywall and insulation. The ceiling to our family room had collapsed, leaving in its wake a restoration invoice of thousands of dollars….not covered by insurance. 

I would love to say I immediately turned to the Lord in thankfulness, but those biblical thoughts were not yet coursing through my conscious. In that moment, I could not let go of the ruin caused by cascading mountains of fiberglass that ravaged the sacred place where our family and friends had played games, watched movies and ate Chinese food on Friday nights.  Then, the horror sunk in of “what could have been.” Had we been home and not taken our daughter’s car to be repaired, one or both of us would have been buried in the rubble that was once our soft and cushy couch.

There are no coincidences in God’s timing. His loving hand of mercy and protection was as evident as the gaping hole in our ceiling. Through the blur of tears I gazed over the grey and dusty piles at the framed Bible verse, which has hung above our fireplace for many years. It had survived this travesty - totally untouched and still in its place, as unwavering as its biblical reminder. Jeremiah 29:11, the virtual anchor we chose together for our wedding verse. “For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord…plans to give you a future and a hope.”  

In the following days as we faced clean up and plans of restoration, I was constantly reminded that all that was lost were just things.  They were either replaceable or not even necessary.  Above all, God taught me that there is no ceiling…no limit…no end to His mercy and protection.    

Soul Food

It has been a long time since I have posted a blog. Being a student has consumed much of my time. Learning new things is exciting and a continuous process through life. But, the older you get the harder it is to hold a thought. How many times have you caught yourself asking," What was I going to say?" Poof! The thought went out the brain as fast as it came.

This past semester I had a big assignment, which at the outset seemed to be insurmountable. I had to write a student workbook and teacher's counseling manual on a particular problem that biblical counselors face in counseling. As I wrote each lesson it became clear to me that there is a common thread that weaves and intertwines itself through life's problems and difficulties. It occurred to me that the answer to the problems and difficulties we face in life can be distilled down to two questions: Who is God? and Who is Jesus?

You might think silly girl of course those questions can be answered, but they don't help me answer the questions to my problems. The answers to the questions go far beyond the surface of "God is our big daddy upstairs and Jesus is my friend," but penetrate and probe deep into our hearts. Do I really know who God is? Do I really understand the purpose of God sending His Son? What do I believe about all of this and does it inform my life?  During this season of Lent what am I contemplating about the most - what I am giving up for Lent or the wonder of the cross?

Ed Welch wrote a book with an interesting title, When People are Big and God is Small. I have yet to read the book, but the title rolls around in my mind quite often. As I was writing each page of the workbook I couldn't help but think, "That's it!" We get buried in our problems because we can't see the face of God in the midst of them. We have made God small and ourselves big. We are getting things backwards and as a result we sink deeper and deeper.

God has revealed Himself to us in His Word. He is a talking God and a relational God. He relentlessly pursues His children like the "Hound of Heaven,"(Francis Thompson) and we run the other way. We are like sheep who have gone astray (Isaiah 53:6). Two of the most profound words in the Bible are, "But God." The storyline of the Bible hinges on those two words and what follows:

But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved— and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. (Ephesians 2:4-10)

Dear Reader, during this Lenten season of contemplation I want to encourage you to ponder the severe mercy of the cross more than thinking about the daily sacrifice of what has been given up for Lent. Ask yourself those two questions. Explore how deeply they penetrate your heart and inform your life. The answers to the problems we face in life are not found in any other place than in His Word! Is God big or is He small?  For your listening enjoyment as you contemplate Who is God? and Who is Jesus?

www.philipmusic.com/OTeachMyHeart.html

As you explore these questions read the books of John and Ephesians in your Bible. I would also encourage you to read Trusting God by Jerry Bridges and The Attributes of God by A.W. Pink. You may discover that God is getting bigger and you are getting smaller.

Love Came Down at Christmas

And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we have seen his glory, glory as of the only Son from the Father, full of grace and truth. John 1:14

While I ascent to the power and truth of this verse from my lips, I often find that in my heart they ring hollow. How does Word become flesh? Dwelt among us? We have seen His glory? These are simple yet monumental words of truth, full of wonder and mystery, written from the hand of God through the pen of John. In one sentence they tell a profound story of how big and full of grace and mercy God is and that we desperately need to be rescued by Him.

Over the centuries Christmas has become more of a warm fuzzy, where we give gifts to express gratitude, we say “Happy Holidays” instead of “Merry Christmas.” The season is full of shopping for the perfect gift that either gets returned or re-gifted. Try to find gift tags, Christmas cards or Christmas wrap that conveys any hint of the Biblical message of Christmas! It is getting harder.

As I watch the hustle and bustle of the season, the visible stress on people’s faces as I venture around a store it causes me to wonder, “Do they know the cost?” Not the cost of what’s in the cart, but the cost of what it meant for Word to become flesh, dwell among us and display the glory of the Father. Have I become so short sighted that I have missed the point?

Pause! Think! Ponder! In her day Mary was seemingly pregnant out of wedlock. How could that be? Shame and scorn begot Joseph and Mary before they were even married. And at the appointed time, they had to make the decreed census journey from Nazareth to Bethlehem because Joseph was from the lineage of King David. I can only imagine how confused, weary and worn they were when they arrived, only to find there was no place to stay, no room at the Inn. The only thing left was a barn and it had a trough. The story gets more tense; she went into labor. In a lowly barn, a tired and worn young couple give birth to a Son begotten of the Father of heaven, the King of Kings and Lord of Lords. A barn had become a palace and the Word had become flesh to dwell among us so that we could see God’s glory fully displayed in grace and truth. Jesus, Immanuel, God with us, who is the radiance of the glory of God and the exact imprint of his nature who upholds the universe by the word of his power (Hebrews 1:3) has come. He is the perfect gift and it cost God everything. Will you receive it? (photo from Revive Our Hearts Ministry)

Thankful

He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. 
Psalm 232b-3a

Every year during the Thanksgiving season we are more inclined to count our blessings and focus on being thankful than other times of the year. At our house, and for anyone who knows my husband, you always need to be ready to answer the question, "What are you thankful for," whether it is Thanksgiving or not.

Several weeks ago at church during our ABF he asked the question! Several people responded in various ways how they were thankful. A hand meekly went up and Byron gave the nod to answer. Through choking tears and simple, yet profound honesty the person attached to that hand responded, "I don't have anything to be thankful for!" Tears were streaming from eyes around the room as we gathered around her seated in her chair and laid our hands on her and began to pray for her that God would meet her in her deepest moment of need and that he would restore the joy of her salvation. God had met us there in that place. He heard our cries and he answered our prayer.  The bond between my brothers and sisters in Christ were knitted together more tightly that day as we brought our sister into the very throne room of God.

In this season of Thanksgiving celebrations if you asked me what am I thankful for? I would tell you. I am thankful for the meek hand that raised up and had the courage to say what was going on deep in her soul and for the group of people present in the room who were willing and ready to drop everything and take her to the throne room of God.

  

Room 130 Part 2: The Value and Importance of Scripture Memory

I delight to do your will, O my God: your law is within my heart. Psalm 40:8

I have stored up your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you. Psalm 119:11

This past year has taught me many life lessons. There is a strange curiosity about dying that causes wonder as one sits by the side of a loved one who is slowly sleeping and slipping away. What is she thinking or is she thinking at all? What does she hear? What does she see? Can she feel my touch? These are all questions that raced through my mind in the last days of her life.

We saw it coming! It was a slow process much like a balloon that deflates because of a tiny pinprick. Her life began to slowly slip over a year ago.

For nearly a year before her gentle decline Byron began to read Psalm 23 to her. Each Friday she looked forward with anticipation for us to visit, and for Byron to read Psalm 23, 100 and 103 to her. Besides hearing scripture, ironically, the other favorite thing she liked was a cup of cold water. After her gulps and sips she would always say, “Oh, that is so good.” It was evident that she was truly refreshed by water and the Word.

Weeks passed; the routine continued. Friday morning visits full of scripture and cups of cold water. Over time she began to memorize Psalm 23. She was ninety-four.

One particular day after she quoted, “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil,
 for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.” She paused and asked, “Does that mean I don’t have to fear death?” Stunned, we answered, “Yes, Lu, Jesus is always with you. He is your great Shepherd, you need not fear death.”

Weekly visits began to take on new meaning. Although we did not fully grasp it right away, our regular visits were becoming preparation for eternity. Those cups of cold water that she loved so much were more than just cups of cold water. They had become like living water (John 4:14) as she drank in the truth of the words she had memorized and heard. She was being washed by the Word (Titus 3:4-7). God was busy in Room 130 preparing her for eternity, and we had become active observers of His sovereign power and merciful providence in the process.

Recently, as we stood by the graveside, tearfully, we reflected on this past year and arrived at the conclusion that when it is all said and done there is not much in this earthly life that really matters. We have a little plaque hanging by the door in our mudroom that says it well, “Only one life, twill soon be past, only what’s done for Christ will last. “To me to live is Christ,” Philippians 1:21.

This past year has taught me the value of scripture memory as well as learning and memorizing the words to hymns and choruses. Hiding God’s Word in our heart is valuable not only to keep us from sinning, but also to prepare ourselves in this life as we journey into eternity. 

Who will be at my side in my latter days? What will I be thinking? What will I be hearing? What will I be seeing? Will I be able to feel the tender touch of those nearby?  Through this past year, the life lesson I have learned in all of this is: While I am still able I want to hide God’s Word in my heart so that one day it will be living water that washes over me as I journey from now into eternity!

               

                       

Room 130

For we know that if the tent that is our earthly home is destroyed, we have a building from God, a house not made with hands, eternal in the heavens. For in this tent we groan, longing to put on our heavenly dwelling, 2 Corinthians 5:1-2.

For me to live is Christ, and to die is gain. Philippians 1:21.

It was 2:58 AM when we got the call. “She is fading fast can you get here soon?” was the message on the other end of the phone. We had gone home nearly eleven hours earlier knowing the end was near. She was ninety-five.

We hurriedly dressed, and in the still of the night when most of our side of the world was sleeping we made what would become one of our last journeys that had been the weekly ebb and flow of our lives for over 3 years. Mostly we were quiet as we drove our familiar forty-five minute path. It was a trip we had made so many times we could almost do it in our sleep. And now, we were making it while the world slept.

Silence was interrupted by occasional questions, “How did we get here so fast?” “Where did the time go?” Waves and floods of memories began to flow, that had spanned our lifetimes, as we neared our journey’s end.

Lucile was the most gracious and giving person I have met. Suffering and affliction had taught her well and it was evident by the way she lived her life. She knew pain and she knew loss. She learned patience as she waited three years for her husband to return home from the beaches of the South Pacific beaten and worn from the trauma of war. She understood sacrifice when she and Chuck took family members into their home and cared for them in their later years. Over the years, as arthritis began to gnarl her hands and back pain became persistent she did not flinch or complain. She pressed on spilling mercy and love into the lives of those around her.

Just as Lu was gracious in living she was gracious in dying. She loved Psalm 23 and had memorized it over the last year or so. Every visit she wanted to say it and have Psalm 100 and 103 read to her. Even in her final days when her body was wasting away and her strength to speak was nearly gone I could see her try to mouth the words as Byron read them to her.

It was 4 AM when we arrived. The stillness of silence was loud, but there was only one thing that mattered. Grasping her old and gnarled hand for the last time we bent over her bed and into her ear said, “Lu, we are here, we love you, Jesus loves you.” Life was draining from her body in a very visible way. In the stillness of night and a dimly lit room at 4:15 AM that Sunday morning God was very busy at work as Lu breathed her last breath, left her earthly tent, and entered into eternity. Tears of sorrow and joy mingled as we quietly wept and pondered the bitter sweetness of death. Loss is gain. Loss reminds us of the fact that she will be missed. Gain reminds us of our eternal home. It is only one breath away.

In the coming days and years, as I think about Lu, I will remember how she lived and died graciously. The character qualities of mercy, patience, grace, goodness, and perseverance that she modeled have left a deep impression on me. She lived her life well. So too, must I. 

Jesus I My Cross Have Taken

I have not forgotten about blogging. I have been a bit distracted lately, but will be getting back to some blogging soon. In the mean time I will be posting some hymn favorites for your edification.

 I love old hymns that have been updated for the purpose of revival in worship. I love the artistry of Indelible Grace. I hope you do too.

There is a Hope

For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is revealed to us, Romans 8:18.

Have you ever had those days where life feels like the ocean tide is permanently in and may never go out to sea again. Wave after wave of sorrow, disappointment, and suffering come crashing in with such force you fear the tide will pull you under. If we are honest with ourselves we would admit that we do have waves like this hitting us.

If there is anything I have learned in the difficult times, when I feel hemmed in, God has not left me alone. He is completely trustworthy. In fact, He is working in and through the very difficulties I face to grow me deeper and more dependent on Him. He makes the Son shine through the billowing waves, calming the raging torrent of my soul causing the tide to go out to sea. I need not lose heart, for there is hope!

A Sovereign Axe

"You hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me!" Psalm 139:5-6

August 7, 1942 is a date, for most people, that has little to no meaning. For the Tabbut family it has everything to do with the sovereignty of God and life.

Sgt. Perry Tyler Tabbut was part of one of the battalions that were the first to land on Guadalcanal in what would become the beginning of the offensive assault in the Pacific Theater during World War II.

For two months the Marines waged war on the Japanese before they took the high ground which became known as Bloody Ridge. They were shelled nightly by Japanese ships that were off shore. 

Not long after the ridge was secure they received orders to move operations to the low lying area around Henderson Airfield to keep it secure from the enemy. They were, now, more exposed to direct hits from the enemy

Foxholes! The shovels flew as they dug holes in the dirt up to three feet wide and more than 6 ft deep. Fortunately, the dirt was softer so the digging went fast. They needed to get the job done quickly because they knew the enemy was relentless. The ships in the harbor and the planes that flew overhead regularly were a constant threat to their very lives.

Perry was a simple, quiet man. He grew up on the farm in Northern Minnesota. He spent a lot of his youth cutting down trees and digging out stumps. He knew the value  of hard work. The night before he set sail for Guadalcanal, he spent his free time quietly making two purchases, a watch and a map, before he went back on ship. He wanted to get an idea of where he was going and understood  the value of keeping time. In time, both purchases would become extremely useful.

As Perry stood on the beach that warm October day, scanning the terrain, he noticed the number of downed coconut trees from previous skirmishes. Thinking back to his tree cutting days on the farm, he said to the boys," If I only had an axe I could chop those trees to use for a roof over the foxholes making them safer." He had not seen an axe since he had left Minnesota. Looking down at the ground one of his buddies immediately replied,"Look, over there, in the grass, its an axe." Little did he know, it would become an axe that changed the course of Tabbut family history. He never saw an axe again for the remainder of the war.

If we don't stop, look carefully and reflect, we miss the evidence of God's sovereign care in our lives. For Perry, that day, the sovereign axe meant protection of life. Though their foxhole took on shrapnel, if they had not put the coconut tree roof over their heads Perry would have not made it out of the hole alive. The Japanese planes flew low dropping bombs through a partly cloudy sky with good visibility.

That was 1942. Perry continued as a Marine through the remainder of the war. He nearly died of Malaria, but recovered, and went on to fight in more bloody battles in the South Pacific. He returned home in December of 1945 to his waiting bride to be.

Perry and Margaret raised a family of three children, Mary, Susan and Byron. His health was never the same. Frequent bouts of Malaria would change the course of his life and work. Perry died in February 1981 at the age of 66. He has been long remembered as a wise, but simple soft spoken man.

On this Father's Day may we thank God for our fathers and the legacy they leave. A sovereign axe laying in the grass nearly 70 years ago meant that Mary, Susan, and Byron would be given life and families of their own, who have gone on to have families of their own. There are no chance encounters with God!